Sunday, April 19, 2009


Louisiana Youth Camp 2009

I have no idea why this thought it so much on my heart.
But here goes...

The other day listening to the song..
"I can only imagine"
And I began to think..
You know, that song is so completely amazing.
It just puts it out there and you can almost see yourself
before the throne of the most high God.

Would you stand in awe?
Would you sing?
Would you worship?

And in your mind, You can only imagine the sights.

And a thought hit me...

You know, I have already been in His presence.

With hands raised and heart willing...
I've stood in the presence of the most high God.
I may not have seen Him with my eyes yet. But I've felt Him.
He's in my heart.

I could almost see the woman on the streets... listening and waiting...
after 12 years needing healing.
And there He was...
Jesus Christ coming towards her.
She saw him.
If she could only touch the hem of his garment.
Healing would come.


My eyes can almost picture Jacob wresting ALL night long
with the angel of the Lord.
WRESTING with God.
And not letting him go until he was blessed.

I know sometimes in my life..
during trials...
during frustrations..
during the hard stuff...
You feel as though you can't even stand.
..And we hit our knees.

...And we think if ONLY I could fall at the feet of Jesus right now.
I need him so badly.

Guess what.
You can.

He hears your cry.
And though our eyes may not see his face..
Though you may can only imagine that right now.

"Blessed are those who have NOT seen and yet have believed."

He is with you.

If He can be with Daniel in the Lion's den.
That same God can be with me when I pray.

Sometimes He does things you don't quite understand.

When I was 17 years old...
My hands were diagnosed with carpal tunnel syndrome.
I wasn't in a huge meeting with awesome voices raising me closer to the throne of God.
I was in a tiny church, with a willing heart and I simply believed I could be healed.

Simply believed.
"Lord, I KNOW you can heal my hands."

No bells, No whistles.. one sentence.

And he did.

I left church that day with completely well hands.

Praise God!

Six years later,

Right in the middle of a Jonah's hospital stay.
I felt so overwhelmed... I could hardly make it.

Suddenly my hands stopped working.
Couldn't write.
Couldn't make a fist.
Could barely pick up Jonah.
It hurt to drive..
It hurt to wash dishes..
My hands ached constantly.

I prayed God would heal me.
And I believed with all that was in me.
But my symptoms remained.

Weeks and weeks went by..
I felt completely cripple without hands.
I pleaded with God and begged for my the use of my hands again.
The devil wanted me to get bitter so badly.

But then I decided..
I'm gonna love him if He never gives me the use of my hands again.

Because I KNOW he could heal me.. if it were His will.
And if He wants me to be like this... Then I'm going to do my best at it.
I'm gonna put on a smile.
I'm going to praise Him through this storm.
And I'm gonna love Him one way or the other.

That night, while visiting with some young people we had over at our house..
I remembered I needed to put on a load of laundry
so Jonah would have clean bibs in the morning..
Mostly because, anyone that knows us well knows we go through a ton a day!

I sat in the kitchen where my washing machine is..
A cousin of mine kept coming in and out... we were talking back and forth..
I use spray n' wash on Jonah's bibs.
It takes takes away all the stains.
I thought, while the kids were over I thought,
I'd get one of them to spray all of his laundry.

I sat talking and laughing and in the middle of a sentence
without thinking I reached up.. grabbed the spray n' wash..
began to spray the bibs and continued talking..
sprayed one..
sprayed two..
sprayed three..

... then I suddenly glanced over at my cousin who was pointing without words.

...I realized what had just happened.

..I stopped dead and dropped the spray n' wash bottle.

I looked at my hands and made a fist.

They were healed.

I knew, I'd touched the hem of His garment.
I knew, I'd wrestled with Him until I got my blessing.
And I knew, He'd stood with me in the den of those
lions when I didn't even have faith for myself.
And I knew,
I didn't have to imagine.. I'd seen Jesus Christ working.

My request now is...
If God can heal the hands that wash all of Jonah's bibs.
He spits up constantly.. because he was such a preemie.
It's pitiful and I believe the same God is going to heal him.
I can't wait until the day he wakes up and doesn't need another bib.
And I don't have to imagine.. I KNOW my God can do it.



  1. Oh Gen... this post is amazing! Wow. Of all the posts of yours I've read, this is my favourite!

    All glory be to our most wonderful Lord Jesus!!

  2. Wow... this brought tears to my eyes. God is so wonderful! Thanks for sharing this. :)

    Love & God bless,


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